Remember when you started dating your partner and there was such excitement in getting to know everything about them – their likes and dislikes, hometown, their family of origin, quirks, favorites, and plans for the future. It was also exciting to surprise them by sending sweet notes, buying little gifts and doing sincere gestures. Learning about each other was fun, effortless and a thrill, but over time, many couples lose that zest. They become complacent assuming they know everything there is to know about the other person.
The problem with assuming is that no person is ever truly stagnant in life. There is constant change occurring in a person’s heart, likes, needs, awareness, and life stages. Losing the desire to discover each other can be a real romance killer and lead to the dreaded “roommate” situation many couples find themselves in. What would it look like to seek out the unknown in your partner? To pursue them the same way you did so many years ago? This could be as simple as discovering new facts about their past and family, revisiting goals, hopes and dreams, or taking fun date night surveys. It could be as engaging as new vacations, new date spots, or starting a new hobby together. It doesn’t have to be hard but it does take intentionality. It is in the getting to know and being known that keeps the love alive.