I find that most people don’t consciously have goals. Have you ever walked into an interview and one of the questions they ask you is, “where do you see yourself in 10 years?” Most of us don’t have answers. We sort of have to make one up on the spot.
As a therapist, knowing my client’s goals are very important to me. However, more often than not, and just like the scenario above, most of my clients don’t have goals. None that they have placed any conscious thought on anyway. So I have to help them come up with one.
Do you want me to help you come up with a goal? You’re probably groaning at the thought. It’s okay. I promise it’s not as hard as you may think. You only need to answer one question: What is it in your life you are currently unhappy about?
The beauty of knowing what you are currently unhappy about is that it can guide you towards what you do want in life. Are you unhappy about your marriage? Then your goal is to be in a happy relationship. Are you unhappy about the way you see yourself? Then your goal is to see yourself in the opposite manner. When one gets in touch with what’s really causing unhappiness in their life, then one can target and transform it. Obviously, we still have to carefully explore and expand on the goal. But, it gives us a starting point and a direction. Once we can identify a goal, all we need to do to is get you there.